tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post5600770155125586385..comments2024-02-21T02:19:16.755-08:00Comments on Widow's Voice: Seven Widowed Voices Sharing Love, Loss, and Hope : "I'm Ok"Michele Neff Hernandezhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02356589209090780127noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-2914362364649701822014-05-07T16:17:58.660-07:002014-05-07T16:17:58.660-07:00Kerryl,
We all go about grief however we need to a...Kerryl,<br />We all go about grief however we need to at the time, don't we? And we can think we're doing okay but our bodies won't let us lie. Having hit the one year mark, I'm just now giving passing glances to my health, which has been good so far in spite of this grief, but I'm back to biting my nails after a 5 year hiatus. And I'm eating crap continually. I've been very vocal about my grief, but it still runs more deeply than I can imagine; hence the biting nails and horrible food. We're all just getting through this however we can, sister~Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00031874239296682781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-46731146175820284792014-05-06T16:27:32.076-07:002014-05-06T16:27:32.076-07:00I did address my grief head on. It took five mont...I did address my grief head on. It took five months before I could go back to work. But even if you address it at the outset, it still takes a long time. As to a grief counselor, if you don't feel comfortable on that first visit, don't press it, find another one. You need to feel comfortable enough to share what you haven't shared and to cry whenever you need to.<br /><br />As to the "Never get married. Losing a spouse sucks." Yes, it does, but I'm glad I had the years I did with my wife. And maybe some day I'll do it again. I think a shared life is much more enjoyable than a single one.Over50Cyclinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16326906021817677829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-11552521508685106762014-05-06T15:50:21.303-07:002014-05-06T15:50:21.303-07:00Thanks, Tracey.Thanks, Tracey.Kerryl Murray McGlennonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05234994378960835050noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-80812692484371381592014-05-06T12:06:15.749-07:002014-05-06T12:06:15.749-07:00Oh, Kerryl. I think you have been doing just what ...Oh, Kerryl. I think you have been doing just what you needed to do. We are a stoic bunch for the most part. And now, it's looking like it's time to "do it" a little differently You and I have done the same thing only opposite!<br />I faced my grief head on. I remember at one month telling my sister, "I'm going to make friends with my grief." Yea, what the hell did I know. Now at 2.5 years later, I'm lost and alone. My grief is an old friend who I'm afraid won't ever go away. I think you sound brave and determined. . Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-21904539404801267312014-05-06T07:22:15.138-07:002014-05-06T07:22:15.138-07:00In June, I will have reached the third anniversary...In June, I will have reached the third anniversary of my husband's unexpected death. I am not okay; I still cry almost daily as I'm still grieving the death of the love of my life. I've grown weary of being asked "how are you" with the expectation of my responding, "I'm fine." Truthfully, I am not fine nor will I ever be fine again without my husband. I've found that no one asking, "how are you" wants to hear the truth. So, with a smile on my face, I lie and say "I'm okay."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-39836153766060511032014-05-06T06:17:17.085-07:002014-05-06T06:17:17.085-07:00Kerryl, my experience mirrors your really closely....Kerryl, my experience mirrors your really closely. I did finally find the right therapist, that is it's own gift. And it does help - setting aside a safe place to talk about the grief, with someone who understands grief and understands kids grief, and who can help me sort out the single parenting challenges as well. It feels like we have to get to the place where the rest of life is stable enough to make time/space for our own grief work. Good luck on your search, I asked people around me until I found the right person.TraceyKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14945295620915349045noreply@blogger.com