tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post7301796203538074491..comments2024-02-21T02:19:16.755-08:00Comments on Widow's Voice: Seven Widowed Voices Sharing Love, Loss, and Hope : Turning the Key Michele Neff Hernandezhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02356589209090780127noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-36628482112134651322013-06-20T15:08:08.156-07:002013-06-20T15:08:08.156-07:00I completely understand everything you wrote. I completely understand everything you wrote. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16823166943418230689noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-84742994740105370622013-06-16T07:42:32.860-07:002013-06-16T07:42:32.860-07:00This was so good and exactly how I feel. Thank you...This was so good and exactly how I feel. Thank you for sharing...Kathihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03160991705866488182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-12984613248779479042013-06-14T11:41:53.389-07:002013-06-14T11:41:53.389-07:00Being his number one. That is exactly what is miss...Being his number one. That is exactly what is missing.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05851021325791634049noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-59851917978472597672013-06-09T19:29:57.926-07:002013-06-09T19:29:57.926-07:00I so hate coming home to an empty house, I end up ... I so hate coming home to an empty house, I end up crying on the way home before I even come through the door because no one's there. I miss my #1 fan with all my heart, and it hasn't changed in 3+ years. This weekend my sis in law was complaining to me about her husband snoring, over and over. Doesn't she realize I'd give anything to have my snoring spouse beside me again...do I have to spell it out to her?<br /><br />I have often said I feel stuck in this grief, and can't find a way out of it. I now believe I'm just not ready to move on, it will take as long as it takes, and somehow we all just need to hang in there and keep going, even tho we don't know where we're going. Those triggers are hell, but you have deal with them as they come. Thanks, Kelly, hope your Ikea desk withstood all that typing!Cathynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-35301131358125563722013-06-08T13:55:36.322-07:002013-06-08T13:55:36.322-07:00"Walk a mile in my shoes", never has tha..."Walk a mile in my shoes", never has that statement rang so true since I have become a widow. People will never understand until it happens to them. You are so right about nothing mattering anymore when you no longer have the one you spent everyday with, loved & laughed & cried with. I have been through a lot of painful times but NOTHING compares to the pain I feel since losing my beloved husband. Thank you for sharing, it helps to know there are those that do understand.<br />LindaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-35904380691519899952013-06-08T08:07:02.120-07:002013-06-08T08:07:02.120-07:00When I first started reading this post I was think...When I first started reading this post I was thinking I would tell you about the Maggie Smith interview, and, lo and behold, your therapist beat me to it. "Pointless." She so beautifully put into a word what I have been feeling for such a long time now. Thank you for such a honest post. You have helped so many grieving people to feel not so alone in our pointless life.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-74989108856621853312013-06-07T19:03:21.587-07:002013-06-07T19:03:21.587-07:00Thanks Kelly, this post is so true to anybody who ...Thanks Kelly, this post is so true to anybody who has lost their love. My key in the door is pulling into the driveway and the garage doors always being closed. He was retired and always hanging out in the garage. We lived a simple content life full of sharing. I have many blessings and people, but as we all know, the void can't be filled. It is really hard being beyond a year and feeling like nobody wants to listen to the broken record that we live. I found this blog recently and the writings are so comforting to me. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-81921843129006928362013-06-07T14:07:59.878-07:002013-06-07T14:07:59.878-07:00I love Your language kelly! It transcibes my thoug...I love Your language kelly! It transcibes my thoughts and feelings of emptiness and nothingness. I feel like taste has been taken out of my life. Every thing is vanity.<br />Since I lost my husband 4months ago, my life has been full of moments I would have shared with him.I miss you so much hils!<br />Thanks Kelly for this post. I still wait for the sound of his car...hilenenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-30551689779011593722013-06-07T12:44:51.937-07:002013-06-07T12:44:51.937-07:00Awww hon, Im so glad you had that realization abou...Awww hon, Im so glad you had that realization about your counselor, painful as it may be. I would like to point out that my counselor is actually INCREDIBLY amazing, which is why this past week's session was hard for me, because I realized that no matter how amazing and compassionate she is, she is not a widow, and so there are some things she just wouldnt understand. Thats why I couldnt break down in front of her. Usually I can. Thanks so much for reading, everyone. Kelley Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17289972201201027609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-67349494445551433272013-06-07T12:25:54.327-07:002013-06-07T12:25:54.327-07:00Thank you for these words, Kelley. I needed them t...Thank you for these words, Kelley. I needed them today. I am struggling with an intuitive counselor, and after three years of talking to her am wondering why I cannot break down in front of her or why she can't see that despite my outward success and transformation I feel like I fell down a hole. Sometimes I feel like my broken record is toxic to her. The angst is coming just as I have completed the first draft of my book. It occurs to me that I am substituting her for my husband listening to me and high fiving my achievements, and that somehow, I need to give that power to myself.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17915118653064364707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-4140786423977804612013-06-07T12:03:00.407-07:002013-06-07T12:03:00.407-07:00Kelley,
I have been without my love for two years...Kelley,<br /><br />I have been without my love for two years now and I still miss him so much. My heart is broken & so alone without him. I try to keep very busy, I have great friends, wonderful children, grandchildren and family but, it is not the same life without your mate. We were married for 32 years and love each other so much!! Like you said, no one will ever understand the loss until god forbid they have to lose a spouse. It is hell! I dont think I will ever stop missing him or loving him & wishing he would come home. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-53379673416165751052013-06-07T11:39:29.339-07:002013-06-07T11:39:29.339-07:00My "key in the door" is actually the gar...My "key in the door" is actually the garage door opening. That's the sound I still listened for even when I knew he wasn't coming home ever again...really good post, Kelley...it's exactly how I feel, except I have no recent accomplishments to speak of... Dianenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-61790974366764914042013-06-07T09:02:33.725-07:002013-06-07T09:02:33.725-07:00Kelley, what a wonderful post, I am crying reading...Kelley, what a wonderful post, I am crying reading this as this is exactly what I feel. Everything is pointless when you have no one to share with. Even when my two kitty's have done something funny who do I tell? Good day or a bad day no one to share it with when I come home. I miss my Mike so much its been just over 2 years. How are we supposed to cope, I just don't know. Well done on your accomplishments. Take careAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-8788824566792765452013-06-07T06:49:31.307-07:002013-06-07T06:49:31.307-07:00Kelley, what a great post! I am three years out a...Kelley, what a great post! I am three years out and still experience these feelings. The good times are not as good and the bad times are even worse, when that special someone is not here to celebrate and commiserate with us. I so get this. I spent 18 months in individual grief therapy and also felt like you.... a broken record. I miss my husband and please find a way to bring him back. Just remind yourself that your therapist gets paid to listen to you! <br /><br />I am tolerant of those around me that have no clue how I feel. But what I don't have any patience for is those around that judge my actions and behavior. I am not crazy or insane or do I need heavy sedation. I am just grieving the loss of a man I spent 32 years of my life with. <br /><br />Thank you for sharing and for your total honesty and congratulations on your accomplishments this week and every week! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268746983441346507.post-5055143371326144232013-06-07T04:39:19.926-07:002013-06-07T04:39:19.926-07:00The Forrest will always remain. New trees grow, ol...The Forrest will always remain. New trees grow, old ones die, storms to knock some down. Trees need light to grow, not darkness. In a way we now live in a Forrest, to find that new path of life, trying to grow out of the old one.<br />Hard to satisfy ones self. Nobody to say a good job of doing things around the house. All what I do now inside and outside of home is somewhat pointless other than to myself. For me it's hard coming and going, you know what's there, nothing moves, or a welcome home. <br />I compete competitively in my hobby, even when I win it is sad not to come home and share. I'm sad that my wife passed away, now finding and staying on that path through the Forrest and see the light. I try to stay focused.<br /> Good post, you shared a lot of what I feel in the now life.<br />Peace be with you..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com