We write about widowhood as we live it. Together we examine the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of life as a widowed person. The views expressed here are those held by each individual author. We take no credit for their brillance; we just provide them with a forum for expressing their widowed journey in words that are uniquely their own.
Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
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Tuesday, January 5, 2010
I Will Try to Fix You
I love this song and the message it holds. As long as I'm clear on what the word "fix" means to me in this concept. If "fixing" means that I am broken and someone has the magical fairy dust that will make me "happy" and make me "forget", than I don't like this song a bit. On the other hand if "fixing" means you will love me, accept me for who I am and where I have been, than this is a great song. I've always hated the concept of needing to be "fixed" after losing Daniel. I've found that lots of people want to "fix" me, help me "forget" (now that is hilarious), get me "better". I don't need fixing in that sense, but I'm learning that I do need acceptance. I am who I am, scars and all. No amount of future happiness will change where I've been nor would I want it to. My future will only be possible because of my past. I won't "get over it" if that means forgetting. What I will do, is move forward with the knowledge of where I've been and a focus on where I want to go next.
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I ...
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I ..
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.
(Coldplay - Fix You)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skUJ-B6oVDQ
I absolutely love this song as well. The tones and vocals in it are (to me) as soothing as the words. Your mention of scars brought to mind several blogs of my own on the topic. You'll never be "fixed" and those scars are what they are, they will ALWAYS be there. But one day they'll take on a beauty of their own.
ReplyDeleteHang in there. Surviving in any form is one of the hardest things we ever do, but it's worth the tears and the struggle and the fight to endure it all.
this made me think of to "fix" something in place, to keep it there (the dictionary has a lot of great definitions), which I like after the line "lights will guide you home" - and fix you there.
ReplyDeleteYou were so eloquent and accurate. I listen to that song and hear the sounds of someone who just wants to help, someone who wants to make it better, but not by erasing it, rather by walking with me through. And the message that I am not alone resonates with me. Any one who could write those words, understands. And so many people connected with it, I knew I was not alone.
ReplyDelete