Friday, July 24, 2009

Next Stop Letterman...

OK, maybe I am exaggerating just a tad...

But last weekend, the National Conference on Widowhood gave me the opportunity to step WAAAY outside of my comfort zone. Like, Way.

This shy, insecure, risk-averse widow stood in front of a whole bunch of women and revealed herself. I wanted to give these fabulous, courageous and generous widows a few minutes of fun. I think they had fun and I know I did.

I really want to pretend nonchalance, to be cool about it, like "Oh, that ole talk?"
But I can't. The experience, like so many experiences since Mike died, was life changing.

I now say, "If I could do THAT, without seizing, throwing up or fainting, (and it was touch-and-go for a while) I can do anything." That is how big it was.

I used to say that about surviving the first 3 years of widowhood and it is true. If you can make it that far...

We all have these defining moments.

My M.O. was always to run from defining moments, to run like hell. Really, who needs defining? Certainly not this babe…

Maybe Mike's final gift to me was the willingness to say "yes" or at least "I'll think about it" rather my usual "not in this life time" when I am offered an opportunity that is scary.

If this is so, thank you Mike. It was not an easy road we walked, that is for sure. But I am grateful for every ridiculously hard moment and every unwanted lesson for I would not be here today if it were not for you. Love you forever, Mie

Mie Elmhirst Widows Breathe Coaching


  1. Unwanted lessons. I hear ya.

  2. Good Morning Mie,
    Having been introduced to you anonymously through this blog, and then meeting you and experiencing your kind, soulful energy this past weekend (and hearing about your stand-up comedy routine) I have a hard time envisioning a woman who would run away from life. Anyway, glad to have met you, and hope to see you on Letterman!

  3. I thoroughly enjoyed your session, Mie! I think I may have stumbled upon your website once sometime last year, so it was extra-nice to get to witness you in person.

    I've found I have a wicked, rather macabre sense of humor after 4 years of widowhood, so I especially enjoyed getting to kick back, listen to your stories, and laugh instead of "learning" something in the session. It was a perfect way to end the day for me. Thanks for stepping out of your comfort zone! =)


  4. It was such a relief meeting you that weekend. I felt the same "WAAAY out of my comfort zone" feelings and was calmed down when I met you! You were great to speak with. I was bummed when my third session discussion of suicide needed to be carried over to the fourth session which resulted in the absence of "widow humor". I could have really used the laugh but guess it was somehow necessary to continue on with the previous discussion. Anyhow, I just wanted to thank you for helping me to feel welcome in a place I felt scared of facing.

    -April Lentini