Saturday, May 3, 2014

A Farewell Toast

“There are as many worlds as there are kinds of days, and as an opal changes its colors and its fire to match the nature of a day, so do I.” 

― John Steinbeck

It's come.

The time for me to step away as a writer for Widow's Voice and let another share their life with all of you…to heal and learn in new ways and see things from another's view.

This moment was inevitable, as the only permanence in life is impermanence (as we all know too well…hence us being here), yet I want to share a bit of what it has meant for me to have had the honor to share my life with each of you over the past 6 years (0r 5...holy smokes…widow brain!).

I remember when Michele was in Austin and asked to meet me at a local coffee shop. Punctuality isn't my strong suit, but luckily patience is one of Michele's!

It was at that coffee shop that she told me about her vision for this blog and asked me if I would like to be a writer.

I did the simple action of happily accepting, but then faced the weekly challenge of putting my struggles, celebrations, mundane moments and more into words.

There were moments where I wanted to throw in the towel. Whether the reason being me doubting that my words even made an impact or having to actually make myself commit to something in a world I felt, at times, would crumble with every step.

As the weeks and years passed, I not only grew in connecting with so many of you, but in being able to look back and see my own progress! Something that we sometimes forget we are making in the midst of sifting through all of the emotions of finding out who we are after life has reminded us of it's knack for the uncertain.

Much has happened.

Smiles. Tears. Fear. Perseverance. Doubt. Struggles. Accomplishments. Life. Love.

This sanctuary Michele has planted, but each of you have watered, has become a garden of life after loss, and I'm blown away that I've made it this far!

I remember thinking I wouldn't live a year after Michael's death.

I remember thinking I would never know what it was to feel happy…I mean REALLY happy….after becoming a widow.

I remember thinking that there was no light at the end of this tunnel I'd been thrown into, simply because I loved another!

I remember.

Yet now, I know.

I know what it is to know what hope is…I mean REAL hope.

I know what it is to not be alone.

I know what it is to enjoy exploring the me that has risen like a phoenix.

I know what it is to smile and not feel guilty.

I know what it is to not feel anger or pain, but joy and bliss.

I know what it is to carry on a legacy, but even more so….create one for myself.

I know what it is to be loved and love and be in love after tragedy.

I know.

So I leave you all with the wish that you remember….but more importantly, you know what is possible.

Where I will go from here is the same place I wish for each of you.

It will be different for everyone.

It will be rocky at times.

It will beautiful.

It will be yours to navigate.

It will be yours to create.

So where is it that I head from here?


At my own pace, taking all necessary breaks, sprinting when my heart yells "Go", and never stopping.

I'll see y'all there, and I hope that you know that when the next writer arrives, that they may have the words, wisdom, thoughts, to remind you that that direction is possible for you too….when you doubt it the most and need to be reminded of it the most.

It has been a pleasure, honor, process to be your Saturday writer (and from what Michele notified me, the longest Widow's Voice writer)!

Please check into my personal blog if you need a Taryn fix (as I'll update it now and then ) or drop me a line on my Instagram, and I'll see many of you at Camp Widow San Diego and Canada!

You've got this shit! Live on!



  1. Thank you Taryn, for generously sharing your story with us.

  2. Thank you for your service to this community! Your beauty and happiness are a great comfort to me in the dark moments! I appreciate you and wish you all the love and happiness and hope and light in the world!

  3. Tayrn, been following you for almost as long as you've been writing. It is good to know that maybe someday I will feel as you do, and be able to share my widow wisdom with someone else, as you have. Thank you so much.

  4. Taryn, thanks for sharing your journey. I have followed you for almost three years now. You were a ray of hope in the darkness and I grabbed and held onto your faith and hope that your held out for us to receive. Everytime I went on vacation with my children and I felt as if I could not breatheand the walls were caving in I knew that you would be there on Saturday giving words of wisdom and comfort.

    I wish you peace, blessings, joy, happiness, and the greatest of all love as you continue your journey of self discovery and enlightment.

    You rock girl!

    Maria O.

  5. Thank you for sharing your journey! Best wishes!

  6. You did a great job! Thank you for sharing your story!
    - mel

  7. Taryn - I'm not sure how I found your blog and Widow's Voice. I am actually not a widow - I am a grieving mother who lost her only adult son in a tragic fire. I reached out to Janine and she helped me alot. I found myself worrying constantly about losing the only thing I have left: my husband. And I became hooked on Widow's Voice. I wanted to thank you for your honesty - and I loved your posts on your wedding anniversary, where you took the day and gave wonderful gifts to strangers. I decided to do that this year, on my son's 27th birthday (last week). It was such a good feeling to give people things my son loved: movie tickets, wine, good books, free gas, etc.....I ended up spending the day smiling instead of crying. So I wanted to thank you for that - it was your posts that got me thinking, planning, and executing my day of giving.

    I wish you well in all life brings you - because of all lf you, I treasure each and every day I have with my husband, I know it could all be gone in a flash.

    God Bless and we got this!!!

    Diane Taylor
    mother of Jonathan Paul Daily, 4/25/87 - 3/1/12

  8. You know I love you mucho! HUGS and blessings as you move forward! <3