We write about widowhood as we live it. Together we examine the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of life as a widowed person. The views expressed here are those held by each individual author. We take no credit for their brillance; we just provide them with a forum for expressing their widowed journey in words that are uniquely their own.
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Well, that was Ian...
Friday was a mixed day.
Great result on one of my subjects.
Speeding fine in the mail. My first EVER!! Not a happy camper. On the up-side, many friends & acquaintances seem to go more than I did above the limit - my fine is about half theirs.
Ian used to speed all the time. At the time he got sick, Ian had one demerit point left before he would loose his licence. And that was because he had entered a good behaviour agreement to keep his licence six months earlier. It was just a matter of time until he lost his licence for a period.
I really hope I've not picked up that little habit from him.
In my session with my counsellor this week we looked at what I'd never forget about Ian, what I learned from him, what aspects of his character I wish I had, what isn't as strong in me since he's gone...
Since he died, I've had one experience when Ian's come out of my mouth - what I said in a situation was very much Ian, and definitely not me.
Six months after Ian died, a friend and I attended our 5-day Test Cricket match. Seating in the members section is unreserved, but you get a sticker from the gate to reserve your seat for breaks in play. On day one, while negotiating changes to gates to accommodate building works at the ground, she forgot to grab a sticker from the gate staff, so we head back to the gate to ask for one.
She gets told it's not their problem, it's her responsibility to get a sticker, so she misses out. My friend got quite agitated as getting a good seat reserved is a priority at the event. The woman heading up the team said 'we can't give you one, it's policy'
To which I immediately retaliated with 'if it's policy, show me the clause in the member's handbook'. Gate-lady wanders of and has a bit of consultation over the two-way radios. On her return, my friend is handed a sticker.
As we walk away to claim our seats, my friend's immediate response was "That was Ian".
"Yeh, I know". You see, I'm usually not that quick, nor confident in a confrontational situation, but Ian was. He very much came out of my mouth then, and I wish it was a trait that has stuck more than it appears to.
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