Saturday, June 16, 2012
“If you are facing a new challenge or being asked to do something that you have never done before don’t be afraid to step out. You have more capability than you think you do but you will never see it unless you place a demand on yourself for more.” -Joyce Meyer
He challenged me.
Yet he provoked me to think, to reflect, to never embrace the me I was...but the me I could be.
He showed me someone I loved. The me that is me.
Then he died.
Who would challenge me?
Who could see the me under the dirt and muck that I could only imagine being?
Who would never doubt me, but always make me question if and how I could handle/do things better?
Who would be there for me to have no other goal but to have them love me, and ultimately, make them proud of the person they had dedicated their life to?
Life was paused.
Over, in my eyes.
But under the thick blankets of pain and grief, one normal widow day, I challenged myself out of bed.
Then to breathe.
Then to see.
Then to live.
Now, 5 years later, I realize that it was never Michael that challenged me...but Michael that challenged me to see the me I am and always was.
So I venture out and challenge myself.
The coming weeks and months, more than ever.
To live, to succeed, to challenge others to see the them that was there all along.
He pulled back the curtain to a world I wasn't ready to see until he was by my side...
A world that years later I'd have to refresh myself to..
A world that is challenging, but that I'm inspired to be challenged by.
He placed a demand on me to evolve.
I was scared to do it without him there.
Now I evolve and demand nothing less than to be afraid, scared, hesitant towards...
All things that I've learned equate to the life we deserve.