The past two weeks have been a whirlwind, and I'm kind of getting acclimated on the occasions where they happen...and in a way enjoying the mayhem it brings.
Last weekend was one of the best parts. We held an Inner Peace getaway for the amazing AWP ladies. From yoga to sailing to long nights of talking....it helped center me back in a place that I had been swinging around on like an out of control pendulum.
Being around such a diverse group of ladies, with diverse love stories and diverse ways of dealing with loss just reminded me that all is well.
Being near the ocean, a place Michael so deeply loves, didn't hurt either.
I felt him. I forgot at moments that he was dead, as I was living life as if he was right there with me, with his soft, close-mouthed, grin and warm green eyes looking down at me.
I feel him when I live life as he's right there with me, and maybe it's a reminder that he never has left.
I must believe that if a feeling that strong exists, just like my love for him, it will never wander or disappear, I just must remind myself that it is real and to use it to get me through the times I need it most....and that's always :)
It's there waiting for me to take hold of, embrace, and have eternally...just as I know he is waiting there, where the world begins, to do the same.
In love with you, baby...