Wednesday, March 21, 2012

I'm Engaged!

I'm sure that's not what you were expecting from my second post as the newest widow to the scene! And while I will take plenty of time to talk about my journey through grief and the pieces of it I still face on a day to day bases, I want to also share the pieces of my life that are happening now. And to share a story of hope and healing.

I won't dive into everything on this one post, cause there's no way I'd be able to share all the ways God has been working this story into my life, or the way Steve (my fiance) has helped me discover a place I never thought I'd see again. You can read more about our journey on my personal blog but just know that there is so much purpose in our relationship and how our paths have crossed each others.

The second reason I wanted to share this news with y'all, besides just wanting you to get to know me, is to share the AMAZING way that Steve proposed to me, and the perfect way that it combined my past with my future.

First of all, I am very hard to surprise. Probably because I'm nosey. Steve totally threw me off and surprised me with this one, and had my closest friends all in on it. To throw me off, my best friend made up a story that she had a photo shoot in the morning, but her car broke down so she needed me to pick her up. So off I went to Stony Creek Metropark to pick her up. But when I found her, she asked me to get out of the car and take a walk with her. I thought Steve was driving that day to Michigan, not knowing he was already there, but as soon as I saw a red rose on my best friend's car, I knew. She handed me the rose, told me how much she loved me, took my arm, and started walking. We walked a 2 mile path - yes, crazy long! But every 200 yards or so I was met with another rose being held by some of the most important people in my life. People who have stood next to me while I suffocated in grief, people who clung to me when I fighting to find purpose in life, who watched me go through my darkest hours, and people who have supported my new relationship with Steve. And as each person gave me a rose, they also walked me down the path to the next person while reading a letter about what I meant to them. WOW. If the tears weren't flowing hard enough (thank GOODNESS it was sunny and I was wearing sunglasses!) I walked with my best friends, Steve's parents, my family, and finally...Jeremy's family.

When I saw Jeremy's mom and sister in the distance, my knees almost gave out. I know that not everyone has a great relationship with their in-laws, but I cannot find words to describe how grateful I am to have married into such a wonderful family. They are my family, and their support as they gave their daughter-in-law a blessing to marry another man other than their son spoke to my heart in ways that I can't explain. I know it can't be easy. I know it faces them with grief they probably weren't expecting - I know it has for me. But there they were, supporting me and rooting for my happiness.

It was the hardest I've cried in a really long time. But my tears turned to pure joy when I saw this adorable, handsome, very nervous, all dressed up and sweating in the heat, precious man waiting for me at the end of the long path. This man that loves me for all that comes with me, accepts and encourages my still very strong love for my dead husband, loves my children, loves God, and whose character makes me want to be better. This man who grabbed my heart very quickly and who has very carefully held all the broken pieces of it and continues to help me put it back together. But also a man I cherish for all he comes with, for all he's been through, and for all he has become because of it. This man whose daughters have taken over my heart.

Our engagement will be a very short one. But I'm so thankful our stories have come together in such a way that it can only be a testament to God's grace and love. I'm thankful to have found someone Jeremy would approve of (he and Steve were friends, in fact) and who has proven to be someone I can't wait to share life with. I feel very blessed to have found two such men in my lifetime.

Oh, and he gave me this!!!


  1. Congratulations!!! I wish you all the joy your heart can hold. Thank you so much for the hope you have given me that life can be good again.I am really looking forward to getting to know you through your writing. PS What a stunning ring !!

  2. wow! what an amazing engagement story. I LOVE the fact that he included your in-laws. That is BEAUTIFUL!!!
    Blessing to you both!

  3. Congratulations! What a thoughtful and loving proposal. He is a keeper.
    I am sure the fact you were friends made the love easier. You both have lost your husband - so he has some understanding.
    Be happy!

  4. Congratulations Vee!

    You have truly been blessed and it's amazing to see God working in your life.

    As hard as it will be for some of us to read this, it is also inspirational. We are all at different stages. I know when I first found this blog my loss was fresher and I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have wanted to even read this. But now I do, and it's inspiring. You are who you are and you're here offering to share your journey.

    Your fiance sounds like an amazing man and one who cares very much for you, your friends and family to have thought out such a plan to propose to you! And the ring is Beautiful of course!

  5. Your post has me in tears- at work! ha! I can't explain how much it helps to hear other's stories through all of this. My fiance' was killed in 2008 in Iraq, and on new years eve 2011 I just got married to an amazing man! I love to hear this part of the story and it reminds me to be comfortable where I am- even though none of it seems normal. Thank you for sharing.


  6. Congratulations !! I can hardly see through the tears. You have found an incredible, wonderful man. Thank you for sharing your joyous moment.

  7. What a truly inspiring and romantic story. Congratulations to you and your fiancee! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.

  8. AS I finished reading this I am bawling my eyes out. I can't believe how it moved me. Thank you for sharing. It gives all of us hope that we will heal as time goes on. It is what I needed to read today

  9. Having read your story from the beginning, ... Wow, yes if you don't believe in God... Read Veronica's story, her pain, her barely able to breathe fight, don't start at her husbands death, that would be an injuststice to her life! Start at the beginning of her blog, then you will truly understand her post about being engaged. Please start at the beginning so you can truly appreciate her blog today.
    Ps: I have never met Veronica, yet I love/ hate her story.

  10. Wow, I didn't expect to cry when reading about a widow getting engaged, but I did. What a wonderful way in which he proposed. Knowing that you have so much support while moving on is to this new stage in your life must be an awesome feeling.

  11. I am a widow also. It will be a year on March 30th that I lost the love of my life. How do I become a part of the blog and post my story?

  12. Wow. So very amazing and touching. You give me hope....hope that I desperately need right now as I am fighting my way out of the darkness. I hope that I am able to find someone as amazing, that will love me and my kids as my husband did. Thank you!