Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Would I Be a Better Spouse ....
.... the second time around?
After pondering this a bit .... I have to be honest.
And say yes.
Don't get me wrong .... I don't think I was a bad wife. Not at all.
Jim and I had a fantastic relationship. We loved each other more with each year that passed.
I knew that we had a better marriage .... or at least seemed happier .... than many people I knew.
We were each other's first love and I constantly felt blessed to have him in my life.
Of course we had our moments, and our struggles, but we were a team.
But even the best teams can sometimes take things for granted.
And even the best team mates can get irritated over the "little things".
But when things are going well, the best teams don't consider the possibility that the team could one day be torn apart.
If I were to marry again, though it hurts a bit to admit it, I'd be a better wife.
Because now I know .....
.... how to let the "little things" go.
.... how to not get irritated by things that used to irritate me.
.... that a wonderful relationship is nothing to be taken for granted.
.... that we can be enjoying life one day .... and grieving the next.
.... that no matter what we think, we really aren't in charge.
.... who my true friends are.
.... that a broken heart .... will not kill you (no matter how much you wish it would).
.... what it is to miss human touch.
.... what it is to miss sex.
.... what it is like to go without sex for a very long time.
.... that life is way too short to spend more than 30 minutes mad at someone.
.... that when someone, or something, crosses my path .... I'm going to pay attention.
And I know that I have to live each day as it comes, as fully as possible, one day at a time .... because there is no guarantee of a next year, or next week .... or tomorrow.
These are just a few of the things that I now know .... things that widowhood has taught me.
These are just a few of the things that will make me a better wife, if I were to marry again.
But I also know this .... if I never marry again .... I'll be OK.
Because I now know that I can do anything.
What are some of the things you now know?
Posted by Janine at 12:01 AM