Wednesday, June 9, 2010

You Get What You Get ....

I've come to realize something over the past several years.
It's about a variation of a sentence I've heard over and over again.
And I would bet that most of you have heard it in the not-so-distant past.
I have come to hate ..... no, abhor, this sentence ..... "I could never do that." Or better yet, "God knew that I couldn't handle something like that."
This sentence is used in varying ways by all kinds of people, but always when talking about another person and her circumstance in life.
I heard it when I had twin babies: "I could never handle twins."
I heard it when I had four, then five, then six children: "I could never handle so many kids."
I heard it after Jim died: "I don't know how you've done it. I could never manage."
Well guess what?
We don't always get to choose our circumstances.
In fact, we rarely get to choose them.
Using the motto of our home while the kids were growing up ...... with life "you get what you get".
And you learn to adjust.
Because you have no choice.
Other than to quit.
But that's not really a choice, is it?
So for anyone who sees a mother with a handicapped child, or for anyone who sees a widow,
or for anyone who sees another person dealing with a struggle in her life ..... please never say "God knew I couldn't handle something like that".
Because you will handle whatever is dealt.
You'll HAVE to handle whatever is dealt.
You will have no choice.
Just as all of us who read this blog had no choice.
We got what we got.
And we keep breathing.
We don't always want to.
But we do.
And we move one step at a time.
And we move forward with the knowledge that we can now handle anything.
Whether we choose the situation or not.
We get what we get.


  1. I think more people like me (who are not widowed) need to realize this important post that you have written about life, "you get what you get." It's certainly a needed reality check for all of us fragile humans (especially "pampered" homemakers like myself).

    I think most people just take it for granted (myself included) that their life will remain the way it is and won't take a "drastic change," or have that, "it won't happen to me" attitude. It's unfortunate that for most of us, it takes a drastic life change in our lives to realize that sometimes, you don't get the circumstances you want in life.

    At any rate, I am slowly trying to learn this concept of, "you get what you get" about life so I don't become overly, "unpleasantly surprised," in the future, but it's not easy.

    ~Mrs. Lady Sofia~

  2. i know, i hate it too. i feel like saying, "you think i THOUGHT i could handle this?! i, like you, thought i COULDN'T handle something like this..." but is there any point? :P

  3. I am another one that also dislikes that comment/question. When asked how I do it, I always say "I just do." I do what I have to and somehow I muster the strength and resources just as anyone in my situation would do. Just do...