Saturday, March 23, 2013


You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.
It's been nearly one year since I started my practice of meditation. 
It came at a point where I was hit head on with the awareness of how much, even at a point where I felt in control and happy, that my thoughts held me back in ways I didn't even know.
I saw the doubt that still had a room booked in my soul.
I came face to face with the mind jabber that was creating a smoggy film of my view of all that life could be.
That's when I started.
Now a daily practice, I see the benefit of acknowledging and noting when my mind is wandering...which it always does....but most importantly, realizing who and what I am and am not.
Which was a huge challenge, at times, after Michael died.
The same way we train and exercise our bodies, meditation has been the same for my brain that I felt I had lost a huge chunk of after his death.


  1. I started meditation just 2 months ago. I didn't realize how much my thoughts were playing havoc with my progress. Self defeating and negative emotions had made me fearful. I am now looking at life through different eyes. I am able to quietly feel emotions and then focus on less self cherishing thoughts. Instead concentrating on the positive things I can do to help others and inturn feel better about my life. Just concnetrating on my breathing for 10 min. is incredibly calming! Luv that you brought this topic up. I wish I had found meditiation sooner!!

  2. A yoga teacher taught me the technique of observing thoughts as they pass through my mind & I find it immensely helpful as I try to live with my grief. I've also been reading Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning, where he writes: "...we needed to stop thinking about the meaning of life and instead to think about of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life - daily and hourly." And moment by moment.

  3. Thank you for sharing this. I can really relate. My mind went crazy after my husband died. I blogged, which helped "release" the craziness, but I until I started meditating, I wondered if my mind would ever actually "heal". But ever since I started meditating, the craziness has quieted down. I think and hope that the big hole in my brain might start to mend itself. As for the hole in my heart...

  4. I am learning to meditate too. I want to be in control of my thoughts and emotions and not just let everything just randomly control me all the time. I am open to listening and learning. I am learning to live in the now and not worry about the future.


  5. So interesting to read about your experiences with meditation!

    What meditation has revealed to me, eventually, was the love and joy that is hiding beneath everything else (including thoughts...) and that it can be accessed even in the hardest of times.

    It didn't happen overnight though. It was more like over decades. :-) But then, it doesn't have to take that long, I know that now.

  6. So exciting to hear I have so many fellow widows and widowers sharing in this life changing practice!