brooke and i
took maddy to the
santa monica pier for
a day of fun.
it didn't start
off too well
because madeline's
forehead took a direct
hit when a pigeon
flew over her.
(she was calm throughout, and didn't seem to mind, unlike brooke and me).
so why am
i bringing this
up today?
well, because maddy did.
last week.
on the way
to daycare.
7 months after
it happened...
"daddy, what's that on the window?"
she said, pointing
at the big
spot on my windshield.
"that's bird poop, maddy."
(she laughed pretty hard when she heard me say poop)
but then she
got serious.
very serious.
"daddy, i need to wear a hat so that birds don't poop on me in santa monica, okay?"
...
now, i've maybe
mentioned this once
or twice since the
day it happened,
and i wasn't even
talking to her...
i haven't
mentioned in at
least 5 months
and i never mention
the santa monica part.
but she remembers
that a
bird shit on
her and that
it happened in
santa monica.
i had no
idea that a
forehead covered in
pigeon shit would
make such a
big impression on her.
but i guess
i'll never forget about
the time a
pigeon shit on
me when i was
in the
jardin de luxembourg
in paris in 1999.
the big difference?
i was 21
when it happened
to me.
she was a few
months past 2
when it happened
to her.
...
i spend a
lot of time worrying
about how
her memories will
shape her, but
i take heart in
knowing that
her first memory
will not be
about the day
her mom died.
...
and i find it
rather amazing
how perspective
can transform a bunch
of bird shit on the
forehead into a
happy memory.
I'm sorry for your loss and am trying to grasp the meaning of this post. I don't want to offend, but I think posting pictures of a two year old who has been defecated on is inappropriate to say the least. Privacy and dignity are important. Sorry, but this is in poor taste.
ReplyDeleteI think Matt is talking about how smart and sensitive his daughter is, and how thankful he is to have her in his life. Not everything has to be clearly spelled out. I think that it's extremely inappropriate for you to judge his post.
ReplyDeleteMatt definitely has a different writing style and perspective on life and widowhood. That's why I love him. Is he inappropriate? Of course, he'd probably be the first to admit so. Was this story inappropriate? Not in his eyes and definitely not in mine. Love it, Matt.
ReplyDeleteMatt. I love your writing style! I think the most beautiful thought in this post is that a child's spirit is so free and that Maddy's first memory will not be her mother's death.
ReplyDeleteChances are really good that if you have to start a comment with, "I don't want to offend..." you're going to offend.
ReplyDeleteI loved this post and when Maddy is older there will be much laughter about the time in Santa Monica when the pigeon pooped on her head, which hopefully will result in a discussion with lots of happy and funny memories of her mom.