Thursday, March 4, 2010

doctor visit

it was time to

go to take my perfect

child to the doctor.

that perfect child

started screaming as soon

as i put her carseat

into the base.

tried to give her

the pacifier while driving

(exceedingly difficult while driving a car with manual transmission).

that didn’t work.

tried holding her hand.

that didn’t work.

tried rubbing her cheek.


we arrived at the doctor’s office,

madeline still screaming.

nothing like a widowed

father carrying his screaming,

inconsolable baby into

the waiting room.

oh the looks i got.

a father turned to me and said,

“you’re brave to do this without mom”

i turned to him and said,

“i have no choice. her mom passed away”

instant tears for

the man and wife.

madeline’s name got called,

the crying couple

wished me luck.

and i carried my

not-so-perfect child

into the room.


  1. My husband was ill when our daughter was born. I did most of the first year with diminishing input and assistance from him. By the end of year one, it was just me - though he was still alive, dementia had claimed him and he was for all intents and purposes checked out.

    I didn't volunteer my situation though. Sympathy made it harder.

  2. Good for you. Sometimes we just need to be validated and if sharing it with others validates everything, then say it. I do.