Recently I reviewed the results of a personality assessment I took at work. It evaluated you on four criteria: dominance, extroversion, patience, and conformity. I'm high in three in and low in one...guess which? ;-) I would have bet I was high in two and low in two, oddly enough I'm not as low on patience as I thought.
It would be interesting to see how my patience levels have changed in the past 5 years. I think I'm less patient in a lot of ways. Life is short. What are they waiting for? I don't have all day. I could die tomorrow. You probably know what I mean. But on the other hand, the small stuff, you know that stuff they tell you not to sweat? Traffic, rude people, spilled milk? I don't even notice those things anymore. They aren't even a blip on my radar. (Okay, maybe when I have PMS they are a blip)
I was recently asked what really makes my blood boil. I couldn't think of anything specific. I do have a couple of things that annoy me, but boiling mad? Not much. Lying, and the lying liars who lie. That's about it. Oh, and self-centered-ness (is that a word?). I am disappointed by people who can't think of anyone but themselves. Otherwise, my widow brain just can't be bothered to get too upset about much.
I think BC (before cancer ;) I could have made a laundry list of the things that piss me off. Now, not so much. Will it matter when I am dying that you tailgate others when you drive, or throw your underwear next to the hamper instead of in it? Will it matter at all to me that you forgot to return my call once, or that you voted for Bush/Clinton/Nader? Will I hold it against little G forever that he throws his backpack in the middle of the living room floor and walks away when he gets home from school? Not likely. I'm no Mother Teresa, and I can get peeved at little crap, but most of the time I let it go pretty quickly. I'm not sure if that is patience or if being a single, working mother I just don't have the time to care! Whatever the reason, it's a good thing. Not sweating the small stuff feels pretty darned good.
Happy Tuesday! - Michelle D.
I'm right there with you. I don't get annoyed at anything anymore unless it is something really outrageous. Losing my husband sure has taught me what is and isn't important. I just wish I could have learned this in a different way.
ReplyDeleteI certainly sweat the small stuff...still...but I see that it is only at certain times. Just today, instead of taking a step back when my Mom offered to have one of her attorneys look over my foundation's website for personal liability/intellectual liability, I got so angry and upset. All I had asked her to do is look at the new banner on the site...I was excited about how it was coming together but at the same time hating the reason that I was doing the foundation. I wanted so bad to tell my husband about it. But I can't. It's those times where I find myself struggling with not getting angry and really really sweating the small stuff.
ReplyDeleteI'll work on that later.
It is a wonderful way to walk through life. A way my husband tried to teach me all the time...I wish I got the hang of it before I had to end up with out him. If anything I am who he wanted to help me be now......
ReplyDeleteI have to say that little things bother me less, because I think of how many times I fought with my love one about them, when now I wish he were here to do those same annoying things! I guess they go hand in hand with appreciateing all of the little things I use to take for granted!
ReplyDeleteI also think about all the stupid things my husband and I fought about. Ira died 8 mos. after a heart transplant at UCLA just 1 yr and 3 mos. ago. His favorite saying was "Be like a rock, let the water wash over you." What could be a better message to us now?
ReplyDelete