Saturday, May 1, 2010
Another and Another
With my 3 year angel-versary in the coming weeks, I thought I'd dig back into posts I wrote in the first months.
Friday, boring as usual. Going through another day trying to make it as bearable as possible. People are people and I am still the same. Sitting in a coffee shop trying to shave off a few more hours in this day to day life of mine. I do no longer know what true friends are for the only one I knew solidly is gone. Expectations are set and expectations are broken. Comments are made and some things are never said. Friends are foes and silence is your only companion. This is my new life. You fight off what you have never known or wanted to believe, but then realize that it is all that you are left with. It is the only thing in which will always be there. I have realized that we have something or someone, that makes are life solid. Puts a stake in the ground and stops the world from shaking. My stake has been pulled and all that was growing near it was uprooted as well. I have tasted reality and laugh at all those who try and deny it. Not only do most take it for granted day to day, but when it gets closer they deny it even more. Maybe they will be shielded for some amount of time but the reality is that there is no hiding from it, just dodging. I never dodged, neither did Michael. The irony of our love story ending is unbearable but is there. I’m off for now to subtract a few more hours off this doldrum of a life and make me that much closer to my soul mate. I love you baby.